Worst Day

Well, I don’t even know where to begin. I’ve been away for some time, and so many things have transpired. So let me begin with the one day that will, so far be the worst day of my life.
On December 10th, two days before the wee ones 15 month birthday. Ugh still gives me nightmares. Honestly, I don’t even like talking about it. But here it goes.

The day started off wonderfully, she was in a great mood….. That would soon change. I didn’t feel like making breakfast. So we headed down to our local diner, The Tipper Restaurant. She loves it there, as does everyone there. She believes that she runs the joint. I let her out of the ergo so she could make her rounds and say hi. Off to the kitchen she ran. One of her favorite cooks was working, who immeditly scooped her up. This gave me the chance to grab a much needed coffee.

I hadn’t even taken a sip, when I heard her crying. I turned and headed into the kitchen. The cook was holding her, his face distraught. She was still crying, he was holding her hand. Of course I thought that she had touched the dishwasher, she is amazed by it. And it does get hot, so I asked still with a smile on my face, “did she touch it?” He just kept saying “I shouldn’t have let that happen” he was holding her hand with a paper towel. I grabbed her and noticed the blood on the towel. Here I was thinking that it was his blood. NOPE it was her’s. At this point I was starting to panic, but I couldn’t. Because I knew this would stress her out. I was holding her hand tight and asked what happened.

They were standing next to the dish washer, watching it work. Issue was they were too close, he had turned to see where I was. And at that exact moment, she stuck her teeny tiny finger into a hole. And when she did the machine cycled and sliced her finger. So here is the moment that still makes me sick. I thinking no biggie just a little cut, silly little girl, I removed the towel, my knees buckled. I had to almost sit on the floor. I’m sure I went white, her finger tip was hanging by a thread. I put the towel back and held it tighter and high above her heart. She is still crying, and as any mother knows. It’s that terrified, I’m in pain cry. And it rips right through you. I just kept saying “her finger, her finger. Its hanging off” The cook asked what he should do call an ambulance? I said call the owner who lives very close. I didn’t want to take my first ambulance ride with her. He wasn’t answering, so I said yes call.

She kept crying and signing milk over and over. I sat down waiting for the ambulance and nursed her. Which helped calm her for a bit. Seriously thank god for boobs. The ambulance whisked us away to the Children’s hospital.

Seems like this must be part one…. Someone has had a fever the last few days and needs her momma…

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To sleep or not to sleep

Sometimes I wonder about this wee one. I will have weeks when she seems to have her own little time table. And others she could care less.
The other night she decided that she didn’t want to sleep. She wanted to read, ok chew her pooh book. And watch hockey with her momma.
And I know she is tired because it is the only time she will seek out her soother.
But make an attempt to put her to bed and she loses her mind.
I’m not one to force her to do anything. She will do it, what ever it is in her own time. It’s like anything with babies, they learn at their own pace. They eat when they want. Learn to crawl when they do.
Maybe I’m setting myself up for challenges in the future. Well that’s what my sister says anyway.
Until then, I guess some nights. I’ll have a partner to watch hockey with.

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