Horrible mommy day :(

I felt like a horrible mommy today. Adelayde was a bear for the last few days. Not sleeping long, crying A LOT, and feeding every hour. Of course I was doing everything I could. Feeding her when she wanted, even when I felt like just a food vessel. Rocking her, swaddling her, changing her. Nothing was working. I was at my wit’s end…..

I went to change her an hour ago, and like most times. I check her tiny toes for toe jam. I haven’t in a while, because low and behold. A mommy hair, wrapped tightly around her right middle toe. And when I say wrapped I mean, so tight it was cutting off circulation. Her cute little baby toe was a whole other color to the rest of them. Of course I panic, not smart. Because she now freaks out more as well. She rips her foot from my grasp, she wants me far away from it. But I want it off, give me back your foot PLEASE.

By this point I’m in tears with her. I don’t know what to do, I can’t find an end. It’s wrapped around twice, and I’m scared. So what do I do I call my handy-dandy midwives. I don’t know what else to do. I feel horrible having to interrupt their lives. But they called me right back and tried to calm me, so they could give me some direction. She said to try to get my nail under it and break it. Easier said then done, I had cut all my nails off the day before. She then suggested to soak it in warm water to try to loosen this. This was hard task to do, with a scream baby. And and equally crying mother. Out come my super sharp tweezers, which I was scared to use. They are tweezerman, and if you have a pair you know how sharp they are.

An hour goes by of me trying everything, but I think I got it. I know this by not being able to see it, not like I really could anyway. It was pretty deep in there. But she stopped crying and basically passed out in my arms. I wont really know until the swelling goes down. But there is a bit more normal color to it. But if in the morning it doesn’t look any better, we will go to the walk in down the street. My midwife said that she has heard about it, but had never know it happen to anyone. Yup that’s me, trail blazer.

Stupid me when she was asleep, went on the internet. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hair_tourniquet I think I would lose my mind if they had to cut her toe. Note to self…. be more of a monkey and groom groom!

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